2 Samuel 18:5-9, 15, 31-33

After Wesley has been mostly dead all day, Fezzik and Inigo give him Miracle Max’s chocolate covered pill. Westley wakes up, “Who are you? — Are we enemies? Why am I on this wall? — Where’s Buttercup?” Inigo responds, “Let me explain — No, there is too much. Let me sum up. Buttercup is marrying Humperdinck in a little less than half an hour, so all we have to do is get in, break up the wedding, steal the Princess, make our escape after I kill Count Rugen.”

This comical exchange in the classic “The Princess Bride” fits our place in 2 Samuel well. Last week we read about Nathan confronting David about his sin and David’s repentance. This week we read a choppy story about Absolom fighting David and Israel. Why is Absolom against David? Why are they fighting? Why is Absolom killed? Why does David weep?

Let me explain — No, there is too much. Let me sum up.

David’s firstborn Amnon rapes his half sister Tamar; Absolom’s sister. Absolom is angry, but David doesn’t doesn’t punish Amnon because “he loves him.” Absolom avenges his sister and kills Amnon. David grieves the death of Amnon. Absolom flees. David forgives Absolom, kind of. David doesn’t let Absolom in his home. Absolom plots to become king at Hebron. David flees.

Now we find ourselves at chapter 18. Despite how choppy this pericope is for our preaching, it would behoove the preacher to familiarize herself with the entire chapter.

The chapter begins with David commanding Joab to deal gently with Absolom. He is not to be killed. David’s armies then defeat Absolom’s “people’s army.” David’s war-hardened soldiers make light work of the inexperienced lay army. Abosolom flees through the woods.

In chapter 14 we learned that Absolom had luscious locks. He only cut his hair once a year. I’m guessing he did not expect his hair to be his undoing. He gets caught in an oak and is “suspended between heaven and earth.” Brueggamann writes about Absolom’s suspension, “Absolom is suspended between life and death, between the sentence of a rebel and the value of a son, between the severity of the king and the yearning of the father.”[1]

But David isn’t there. At this moment David isn’t given the choice to save his son. Joab makes the decision for the King; not the father.

This tragic chapter concludes with David’s most visceral misery. David has multiple children who will perish and in every other circumstance he is stoic or silent. Not here… In one verse David calls Absolom “my son” 5 times. The King is, finally, a father. Absolom is a tyrant and an enemy of the state. He deserves capital punishment. David has a kingly role to punish this tyrant. But this tyrant is a son. Finally, David weeps over the death of his child. Perhaps David is finally weeping over the death of many children.

There are multiple avenues we can traverse in our preaching of this climactic passage. I want to discuss two.

First, one could preach on the connection between Nathan’s prophetic decree and what happened. Nathan told David in the past, “The sword will never leave your house.” *gulp*

If we go down this road we need to see that what Absolom desired was not wrong. He was the King’s son and desired the Kingdom of his father. This is expected. One day it would be his. The problem isn’t his desiring to be King; that was expected.

The problem was the means by which he sought to bring about this reality. Absolom didn’t have the patience to wait for the throne. It may be his one day; but it wasn’t his yet.

The problem is that Absolom is the son of David. The last few weeks we’ve been reading about David taking that which wasn’t his by violent means. It is almost inevitable that Absolom will imitate his father. As the father is, so will be the son.

Here is an imperative for parents; both biological and ecclesial. The lesson from David and Absolom is to not miss our opportunities to sow seeds of compassion in the lives of our children. The means by which this happens is by living compassionate lives ourselves.

The second journey one could take demands a bit more pastoral liberties. Here I want to contrast the relationship between fathers and sons. I wonder how many hearers of Jesus/readers of the NT would have thought about David and Absolom in relation to the prodigal son.

Absolom is a prodigal son. He is a son that squanders his inheritance. He is a ton who tries to take what will eventually be his without patience and by force.

In Jesus’ parable the father is quick to forgive, brings the son into his home, and throws a party. The seeds of violence and debauchery and discord are uprooted and in it’s place a planted the seeds of compassion and mercy.

When David weeps over Absolom perhaps he is weeping not just for his loss but because he know that he missed his opportunity. Now it really is too late. And maybe it was too late when this battle began. You see, David had an opportunity to welcome Absolom back into his home.

When we read the story of the compassionate father/prodigal son and David and Absolom side by side there are some striking contrasts. We’ve see how the sons are similar. The differences lie in the responses of the fathers. (These go back to chapter 13)

The compassionate father runs out to his son. He is looking for him.

David sends Joab to bring Absolom home to Jerusalem.

The compassionate father opens his home to his son.

David doesn’t let his son in his presence for two years; let alone his home.

The compassionate father lavishes love on his returned son.

David begrudgingly permits Absolom back.

Given the history of David and Absolom we see that it’s too late… The seeds of violence have been sowed, watered, and grown in Absolom. The sin of David is transferred to his son. As the father is so will the son be.

Preacher, may we not shy away from this passage because of it’s apparent challenges. This is a word we need to hear. Your church needs the difficult words of David’s grief.

As school shootings increase year after year; as suicide rates continue to affect younger and younger persons; as depression and anxiety racks the hearts and minds of our youth, we have a responsibility to live our lives in such a way that our children can imitate! We can blame media. We can blame video games. We can blame politicians and policy. But, ultimately, we bear the burden, church, of raising our children. As we will be, so will be our children.

[1] Brueggemann, First and Second Samuel, 319.